posted by Site Administrator (Michael) at
Thanks Mike for having this, its a great idea and I'll pass it along to other gay exJWs I know, hopefully it will serve a great purpose. Its doubly hard coming out of the organization as a gay, lesbian, or transgendered person, this type of support is invaluable.Sherry
By Gretchen956, at 1/24/2006 3:52 PM
How do you overdose on vitamin c?
By Anonymous, at 1/30/2006 9:24 PM
Congratulations on getting the site up and running--it looks great. As a straight ex-JW, I just wanted to extend my support and best wishes to the folks reading.
By Casey, at 2/02/2006 4:34 PM
FYI...it is the truth!
By Anonymous, at 3/01/2006 11:25 AM
you have beautiful teeth
By Blog Off, at 3/07/2006 2:12 PM
To gretchen956: I aspire to serve a great purpose and how that in the end I don't discover that I was playing for the wrong team the whole time.To anonymous: You overdose on Vitamin C by taking too much of it.To Casey: Thank you for your support!To anonymous #2: Thank you. I'm always suspicious of blog comments that are 100% supportive to the author.To Alan and his Blog Log: Lol! The better to bite you with.
By Site Administrator (Mike), at 7/24/2006 3:58 PM
As a straight ex-jw my heart goes out to you all. I know how hard it is to leave, but once you are free of the guilt and crap they have trowelled onto you all your life its wonderful to live in the REAL TRUTH.All the best folks, be kind to each other.
By Janine, at 11/20/2006 6:43 PM
Help... my heart is in my throat. I'm so confused, what have I done... What about the future? What about the hope? I can't live w/o the hope but I can't live like this any longer.
By Anonymous, at 11/23/2006 12:05 PM
ive been depressed since i was disfellowshipped had numerous relationships be them gay or straight alchol and drug abuse not to mention several suicide attempts its been 17 years and i still feel spiritually starved & torn. will never accept another religion as the TRUTH but i am hurting and still depressed need some encouragement or answers at my wits end.
By joanne, at 5/10/2007 9:35 PM
Hey Mike...I commend you on the category of the different types of (ex)JW's. I spent many years feeling bitter about the organization I was raised in and some of the doctrine...I recently had to take a sick family member to a District Convention. Dreading it all the way. I have to say (not being week of mind) I was totally amazed at the way this group of people has evolved. This was not the same organization I was raised in. All the people who I never imagined in my wildest dreams are coming back now. Yes disfellowshipping is still there but you really have to be pretty dogedly unreppentant now days to get DF'd. I think its like any club, organization the rules are there and you know what they are so if you don't want to follow them...leave. Having said that I know that some people got a really rough go of it by some imperfect men in the organization. I have spoken to the producer of KNOCKING who I might add is gay.I think its amazing he took on the documentary in the face of all those who continually shoot him down for it. Not everybody who left and is gay feels it was a horrible degrading experience in the organization. As for Raymond Franz's "Crisis Of Conscience" ...He has returned to the JW's. Thats right! Whether you believe it or not is up to you and YOU alone. Whatever you do live life positively, not negatively. And yes its possible to overdose on vitamin C more so on vitamin "E"...right Mike! Hee, hee. Take care everyone and be true to yourselves no matter what you do! Life is too short and its easy to get nasty in all sorts of ways. I have calmed my hedonistic ravaged days. And well taken myself on a bit of an attitude adjustment...I am not in my 20's anymore. Being told what to do doesn't come kindly to my psychy. So we will see which path I choose. My two bits. Keep Smilin
By Anonymous, at 6/27/2007 12:39 AM
hm wellim a bisexual 17 year old my parents are jehovahs witnesses.i came that i couout to them a couple of months ago and all hell broke lose.of course, i also told them i was wiccan....not a good idea, right? O_Oanywhoi had left home sold be closer to my boyfriend and for once, have a little bit of freedom but they came to my friends house and gave her mom an ultimatum that if i didnt come home in two days i couldnt come home at allso.i had to go home.and here i am. in hell. i have to go to the meeting in a few hoursill basically just sit there and ignore 90% of what theyre sayingi cant stand thisi guess this comment isnt really relevant but...does anyone have similar experiences? :(
By griffin21, at 7/29/2007 9:15 AM
Hey griffin21....I read your post and I feel for you...the option I chose was to stick it out until I had the resources to move on and support myself moving to another city and gradually breaking it off. Having said that you have an important decision to make which path in life you want for yourself. Having lived the "lifestyle" for many years there are lots of things that are not so great to be "proud" of and I had a wide range of stable and crazy friends. Our lusts pull us intensely but its your life to live and you must live it. I wrote the piece above you but I must say its never easy to reverse your course in life once you have made such a big decision. I hope you find peace in whatever you decide and be safe out there.
By Anonymous, at 10/08/2007 11:21 PM
Hola...Fui Jehovah's witnesses por casi 10 years.Hoy estoy retirado de la organisacion. My sister's siguen en la congregacion.I am Gay.Now my life no is happy....pero me siento muy contento de vivir y ser lo que se que soy; GAY.Felicidades por tu sitio.Conozco a dos miembros de tu blog.John de Houston y John Sullivan de California.Love for you.I am from Mexico. Reynosa, Tamaulipas Mexico. Border McAllen Texas.
By JOse, at 10/15/2007 2:40 PM
Hi everybody!I am Christophe, a 22 year old man from France.My mother's a JW since I was a child (20 years roughly).He left the JW organization when I was 15, but my mother doesn't know I'm gay and she still convinces I'll go to meetings with JW's.I got a trouble : how can I say to my mother I'm gay, done I'm a non-baptized exJW?Thank you for your help, please keep contact on my e-mail adress : firstname.lastname@example.org .Christophe
By Anonymous, at 11/07/2007 4:38 AM
Thanks mike for a great idea I come from a family of jw's in spokane, washington father was a elder mom & dad were grooming me to go to New York to bethel. I was terrified, I have been out of organization for 20 years now once I started a group of ex-jw's that were struggling with coming out but got so many people all messed up with drugs one kid was homeless could not bear the pressure so disbanded group ..think this is a great website live in tacoma and would love to start a group with someone for people to reach out to support group let me know ...mike davis-Tacoma,wa Partnered for 13 years love it...
By Anonymous, at 1/10/2008 1:06 PM
Hi Mike! Great site and list. I want to add my name; however, it is not clear to me how to add my profile. I have a myspace profile I'd like to add. Best, Arthur, Los Angeles
By Arthur, Los Angeles, at 6/04/2008 9:09 AM
http://www.wjla.com/news/stories/0508/517023_video.html?ref=newsstoryThis is interesting. www.narth.comI've lived the gay life and I felt empty after. Returned to the ORG hoping to be "repaired". Changed professions too to be more masculine. Didn't help. I found that gay sexual experience is just as haunting as before. Lack of counsellors for people struggling with their homosexuality that conflicts with their faith is the major obstacle to real lasting change. Jehovah's Witnesses as a whole are just as prejudiced as the rest of society against someone struggling with homo feelings. And as the posted videos shows, gay activists have very little respect for difference of opinion too. I say to those who think of "coming out" - think twice before you do it. You can't reverse the experience, the stain it leaves in your memory cannot be erased, even over time. If you're guy and you inserted a penis in your mouth or did someone's rear end in the heat of passion - it's there with you forever, the memory of the whole thing. You never quite feel the same man again. The conflict within can be unbearable. No amount of praying can fix this. Be very careful who confide in the congregation too. In my case it led to three men knowing it instead of the one I confided in (so much for privacy!). Judicial Committee sealed the deal and now this record of me as a former fag stays with me even if I move to another congregation or another city. I have been feeling depressed and suicidal for a few years because of this difference in beliefs and sex desire. Labels like "faggots" and "homos" are still used by many witnesses privately. I heard them and pretended I was OK with them, but it really hurt to hear it from a "brother". That's why I left. I might come back, since I do love Jah & Son. But not yet, not yet. Be careful who you confide in, I repeat. The loneliness and the isolation that one feels within this "spiritual paradise" if one is gay is enough to drive many like me away from the Org and eventually from God as well, as we blame the humans intolerance on Him.
By Anonymous, at 6/29/2008 1:00 PM
How do I go about removing my entry?Vernon
By Vernon Korff, at 7/01/2008 8:02 AM
It's really interesting to have found this site. have came across others but they were a little off,they all had bad experiences...im a ex-witness even though not disfellowshipped,i have been inactive for some 15yrs which i have lived a lesbian life.I would like to communicate with lesbians who have lived a witness live before.I live in Jamaica.
By diann, at 7/14/2008 3:12 PM
Hi Everyone:I'm very happy I found this site and look forward to reading our stories and comments. I was partly raised as a Jehovah's Witness after my mother died of cancer in 1972. My mother was "opposed" to the faith but my father was a member of the Birchmount Park Congregation in Scarborough (Toronto), Ontario, Canada. There were frequent altercations between my father and mother over religious differences before my mother died. After her death me and my younger brother "decided" (it was not quite as voluntary as this sounds) to "cooperate" and accompany our father to the Kingdom Hall and immerse ourselves in the study and practice of the JW faith. I spent about five years involved in the faith but was never baptized. By my teens I was exposed to broader belief systems and I acquired doubts about the JW theology and doctrine. I gradually drifted away. When the one particularly homophobic elder learned about my sexually active later life from my younger brother (who also turned out to be very gay), he evidently took some steps to retroactively have me disfellowshipped--they needn't have bothered since I have not stepped into a KH in almost twenty-five years. It would take me a while to collect and catalogue my thoughts and feelings about my JW experience. I do not feel hostile. I think that my JW experience may have alienated me in many ways and affected my social development. If anyone is interested, you're more than welcome to contact me at email@example.com. I welcome your questions and comments and extend my best wishes to everyone.Best regards,Wayne
By Anonymous, at 8/24/2008 8:10 PM
I haven't seen anything recent, are you still adding profiles?
By Anonymous, at 4/01/2009 10:25 AM
For those who thinks life is better without Jehovah, you guys are crazy. Remember that Satan will always try to illusion things and make everything seem better without Jehovah. There have been JW's who are borned with severe disorders such as bipolar and many worse disorders and they still try their best to fight it off. Why can't you guys do the same? Even if you couldn't completely become heterosexual, Jehovah never asks us to be perfect but as long as we're continuously trying, even if we never completely win what we're after is almost considered a success. A success because you still put faith in Jehovah and youself and for still trying everyday. Even if it meant to be internally gay still but never to have any homosexual intercourse but you're still trying right? then in paradise earth, we can all believe Jehovah will heal us and when that time come, we'll know what the better and REAL world mean. I can't believe you guys even have the guts to create this website. This is satan's site!
By Jehsovusah, at 4/26/2009 3:07 PM
You know what, I can't believe some of you guys actually believe life is better without Jehovah. Only until we're on the verge of life and death will we know how much we need Him. Of course Satan will try to make everything as fun and exciting to us as it can be without Jehovah but it's all illusion and just for the time-being. I know that some of you may not have as much of a choice as those who chooses to be gay but the point is that Jehovah never asks us to be perfect but as long as in our heart he knows that we're truly trying. Even if it meant still mentally being gay but never commit any homosexual intercourse for the rest of our life. Even though you may not win your homosexuality desires, knowing that you refuse to give in to homosexuality is already the victory. Jehovah understands us but it's our doubt that says he doesn't understands us. And that's what Satan wants us to do. Doubt. We can be sure that in the paradise realm, he will heal us. The best support we need is not from another sinful being, but from Jehovah. That is our best supporter. Getting supporter from another gay person only encourages us to let it cut deeper into the flesh than into the blood.
By Jehsovusah, at 4/26/2009 3:19 PM
For all those who have been associated with the organization and no longer are...Please try to come back! I have been on BOTH sides of the fence and was so very unhappy in the "world." I struggle each and every day tomaintain a good conscience-and yes it is a struggle!! I have a moderate amount of peace though, knowing that I have-and will continue to serve in a wholesome manner. I have the assurance that the only person-Jehovah God- has truely forgiven me. I had a very hard time to trying forgive myself. Yes, there will be others in the congregation that may not be so willing to forgive, but that is between them and Jehovah. I can only work on myself. After all-they are imperfect too. Just don't give up!!
By Anonymous, at 8/16/2009 3:26 PM
Hey Mike, great webpage. Any hot ex brothers in Hawaii? heheh. Grab a coffee or cruise on the beach.31 6'2 185Lbs brwn/brwn Masculine Hawaiian Portuguese Mix Discreet AthleticA hui hou.
By buckstopshere101, at 1/04/2010 1:51 AM
I am sorry so many of my gay siblings are still struggling with being and expressing their sexuality. After acquiring the reference Bible, I started reading it cover to cover, and even more of the truth was revealed. So much more information was revealed in the references, more of the truth! I have always felt Jehovah God made me gay; afterall He is the God of Love. It is nothing to be ashamed about. I just wish the Society would reconsider following the path of Christendom in condemning it.
By Anonymous, at 3/30/2010 5:14 PM
Great Idea Mike! Wish I had support when I was coming out. As a Watchtower pioneer, I absolutely believed "if this is not the truth then there is no truth." And it was with great timidity, well, outright fear would be a more honest statement, that I picked up the phone and called an ex JW friend. What did he know that I didn't know? Something was wrong, but I could not put my finger on it. (BTW, It is a shame for a grown man to be that terrified of his religion). Over time, I saw the errors, the contradictions in teaching, the tyranny, and I saw my own self righteousness -- for I had become more interested in being "RIGHT" than being loving and accepting of differences. Guilt, fear, manipulation had kept me from learning, exploring, defining who I was. I was ready to leave. So I left and never regretted it for a moment. In time I attended seminary, and became ordained protestant minister. Not so sure what I theologically believe now, but I feel no one has a monopoly on God or truth; kindness and acceptance has replaced my arrogance. I am a published writer, broadcaster, public speaker with ministerial background currently living in Florida. Glad to make friends here and offer my support to the injured and questioning. firstname.lastname@example.org Troy
By HereForYou, at 4/01/2010 12:38 PM
Thanks for this effort! Actually, it seems the culmination of much of what I have, personally, wished--and tried--to do. You seem to bring some knowledge, skill and compassion to your site, some things which of which are often missing elsewhere.
By azmattachine, at 8/02/2010 8:49 PM
Hi guys, I am an ex Jehovah’s Witnesses who has come out as gay. I am in Leicester in England, I now volunteer at the LGBT centre in the city. If any LGBT ex Jehovah’s Witnesses or if you are still an active member of the organization and need support to come to terms with being a LGBT Jehovah’s Witnesses. Please come to the centre and we might be able to help you. Our address is -: The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Centre. 15 Wellington Street. Leicester LE1 6HH Our phone number is:- 0116 2547412.The email address is:-email@example.com. Thanks for your time in reading this.
By Anonymous, at 8/11/2010 5:34 AM
Hi there,I am just wondering how I can remove my profile from the site? It is dated and the info on there is incorrect. Is there an email address I can contact an administrator to have this done?Thanks.
By Anonymous, at 11/24/2010 7:01 PM
Hi Mike! Congratulations for your work. I was never a JW but i'm in a situation that I need help too. I'm in the process of ending a relationship with the person I love that is an ex-JW that has just decided to come back to his witness life because he suddenly became scared about the arrival of Armageddon due to the recent events happening in the world. We love so much each other but couldn't find a solution and it has been a struggle to me. Do you know websites where I can find people to share similar experiences? That would help me so much. Thank you very much :)
By Anonymous, at 8/20/2011 6:56 AM
1ST of I hav no clue how I stumbled upon dis site, but I hav to say my heart truly goes out to all ex-JW's (gay r st8) U hav 2 kno dat its da truth n dat Jehovah never abandones his faithful servants..Plz try harder make a reply to the devil who taunts us all. Make ur petitions known to Jehovah. He cares for you (1Pet 5:6)Remember Satan's tactics with the Israelites right b4 they were to enter into the promise land??............with aqape one of Jehovah 's Witnesses
By Anonymous, at 8/29/2011 10:27 PM
I think you have a great site that shares much of how many of us felt. I was inspired and wrote this today about my experiences with being a gay JW. http://justinkjohnson.blogspot.com/2011/10/peaceful-warrior.html
By Justin Johnson, at 10/28/2011 4:36 PM
Nice to see other gays and lesbians that broke free of the oppression. I am a lesbian and have been free for over a decade.
By EricaC, at 12/03/2011 8:07 PM
Hmmm. I think my original comment was deleted before signing up. It's great to see so many other gays and lesbians that are free from the lies they called "the truth". We know that homosexuality is very natural and that alone is proof that we were being misled. I am a lesbian and have been free for over a decade.The psychological abuse of being told that there was something wrong with me still affects my life. Even with that, I'm still so glad to be free to evaluate things with my own heart and mind instead of the fear that they tried so hard to instill. I wish you all nothing but love!
By EricaC, at 12/03/2011 8:12 PM
Special Event: Jehovah’s Witnesses, Former Members and Families May 12, 2012Philadelphia, PA Questions to ExploreAttendees and facilitators will explore questions that are often central to the concerns of former members of cultic groups and families/friends troubled about a loved one’s group involvement: About ICSAExploring a psychological perspectiveHow are cultic groups different from and similar to other kinds of groups?Why do people leave?Can departures be facilitated?What problems do people have when they leave?How can they manage these problems?DisfellowshippingProgram9:30 a.m to 5 p.m., with a 75-minute lunch break. We hope that attendees will chat informally during breaks, in the evening, and after the event.Saturday morning will consist of directed discussions aimed at encouraging participants to describe their relevant experiences and explore their current opinions regarding the key questions listed above. (Participants may choose not to contribute to discussions, if they wish.)In short, the event will focus on attendees’ experiences and views, not presenters’ prepared talks, so as to help attendees better understand these important questions and enhance their capacity to express themselves and help others as well as themselves.Fee$25 – Current ICSA Members$50 – Non-Members (includes free Web membership to ICSA) icsahome.com
By Pat, at 3/15/2012 12:37 AM
It gets better with more distance and time. I have been disfellowshiped for 5 years and I look back now and can't believe how lost I felt. Today I have never been happier and more grounded. The peace I have inside is amazing. Keep going!
By Anonymous, at 5/31/2012 7:03 PM
You are such a puppet! I am an ex JW however I am not gay. I have never felt more relieved and confident in my own choices. As a JW I was raped by another JW and the elders advised me not to call the police or tell on this person because it would bring negative attention on the organization. So my parents listened and the elders reprimanded the man by taking away his privlages. That's it. I had to sit in the same hall as him every meeting and feel that shame of everyone knowing what he did to me. I found out I was pregnant a few months later at 14. My friends all pulled away and I was marked for the rest of my life as a whore because everyone that saw a teen with a baby thought I had sex. Is this how Jehovah would want me to live? What about the people he elected as elders? I prayed and prayed for years and got no answers. I begged the elders to do right by me and got nothing. I had meetings with the circuit overseer and wrote the branch... No relief, no answers. I finally left when my daughter was 4 and sued my rapist for pain and suffering and child support. I won. I moved out of town to run away from the shame he caused me. I am now married to an amazing worldly man who adopted my daughter and we are so happy. Finally I have peace and happiness and who did that? Jehovah? No ME
By Anonymous, at 5/31/2012 7:38 PM
TO JESOHVUSAH: You are the perfect example of someone who has been brainwashed by the organization. I was raised JW and am gay. I love who I am, and have had a very happy life. Sure, I did go thru a period of drug abuse, etc. But I came out of that and am much stronger today for it. I will never become part of any church or congregation that insists I have to wear suit and tie, and sing the same songs out of a book, and put on a false persona to look good in the eyes of my "brothers and sisters", or to go knock door to door like a cheap salesman. No....I understand that this entity we call GOD is all around, in everything. And so why should I limit him/it to your so called form of "worship"? My form of worship/communion with GOD to give you an example, would be to go out in nature somewhere, eat some mushrooms and get naked, and play beautiful music with friends. Oh....but that's Satan's illusions right? lol Life becomes so much more interesting and diverse when you're not confined to the organization's strict mold. And that's the way life is meant to be lived. I don't care if I do "live forever on paradise" or not. Because I'm living eternally in THIS moment. We all create or own heaven and hell on this earth, as we stand.
By Anonymous, at 9/19/2012 2:16 PM
I know just what everysingle one of ya'll are saying,,, but I totally disagree, with how you blind yourselves to the reality of things... I know how horrible the struggle is.. and I am struggleling right now... I feel emotionally drained,, and spiritually dead... I have engaged in gross conduct.. that I am not proud of.. because yes it feels good and you get that momentary happyness.. and you fell like the world in that moments of extacy has passed... but inside you know its wrong,,, yet you really want to turn away and excuse your self when you know there are no excuses what so ever. . . I am not lashing at ya'll who think that way because I am the same way.... but we shouldn;t give up so easily we dont see whats right infront of us.... Jehovah loves,, us yes but he cant stant for the gross conduct that we practice....yet he is willing to accept us and help us... there is absoulutley nothing that Jehovah will not forgive if we truly sincerly want to fight for what is most important or what we should see as more important and that is our relationship with him... satan wants to take that away from us because unlike him we still ahve an opportunity to gain what he has lost and thats a relationship with the most powerful being in the universe and the blessings he provides to those thsat seek him with a complete heart,,, cant we see that we are only allowing ourselves to be slaves of our flshy desire,,,, that freedom we seek is only adding shackels to us.... there is no freedom in having to constantly feel an excstasy through masterbation or sex... its an enslavment to our own flesh,,, an enslavment to satan... were mere pupets in his hands... so listen to this or not or think I majust stupid and dont understant I totally understand because I cry my self to sleep almsot everynight,,, and I feel that this is the owrst thing anyone can go through... but will not stop fighting... untill the very end... I will not give in to my flesh I will not give into satan, I will not allow my self to fall in such away that I may not get up... I know I will stumble I know I will be crippled, but with Jehova by my side helping me, picking me up when I fall, I know I can do it... and I dont want to do it for eternal life or for a perfect body or what ever it is that Jehova has promised us... I need to do it to prove to satan that no matter what he does to us, no matter how much he shaked us and crippes us and really bends us in half we will fight because we know that the most valuable thing anyone can have is a relationship with Jehovah, my life doesn;t matter... what matter is our God our creater the one who gives us everything day after day even though we dont deserve it. and I will fight fiercly to defend my relationship with Jehovah, I will fight for it with my life.... because I have faith that no mater how many times I fall he will pick me up and no matter what happened he will help me I dont ask for eternal life I just cant allow satan to keep laughing in Jehovahs face because of my gross conduct... Just like Pual I too am "[...]convinced that neither death nor life nor angels nor governments nor things now here nor things to come nor powers, nor height nor depth nor any other creation will be able to separate us from God’s love that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. romans 8:38,39
By Anonymous, at 12/27/2012 10:42 PM
I have a trans genome not gaywe also were called gay by themI was physically attacked by 3 guys with an elder at home the cops helped them conceal paedos.anyway today is trans rememberance day 20/11 used by some for the deaths and violence involved we did post one in support of the gays and lesbians for such deplorable violenceplz always remember report crimeas we have also posted and warned them heavily where we were.gina x
By Anonymous, at 11/20/2013 5:43 AM
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A place to meet other persons raised as Jehovah's Witnesses who are gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered, and to help those newly seperated from the organization transition to a new life.
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